That's All, Folks

I know I posted the best-of a day early but I'll be way too busy cleaning and packing tomorrow. There weren't even 100 SO's this week and the BH is back up and running, so I think we've rode this train as far as it's gonna go... Thanks for everything, check back next summer because we will definitely be back! 

Week 14 Best-Of

SO to summer shout-outs. you will be missed...

SO to favre becoming a coastie... and bigger SO to the media clusterfuck being over

ASO to the ladies I work with telling me that I'm going to get cancer because I keep my phone in my bra. As if I wasn't neurotic enough...

so to the yoga instructor from the serf, who also works at the fruit stand on library mall. you're pretty doable

ASO to missing out on a booty call because i didn't wanna break a prior commitment. DAMN my mother for teaching me good manners

ASO to my own mother sexiling me tonight... my life is an embarrassment

SO to everyone on Madison's Missed Connections Craigslist page. Even though you're all creepy, I wish you the best of luck in all of your semi-stalkerish endeavors

SO to finally being done with college.
ASO to realizing i can no longer justify my lifestyle as simple college student shenanigans..now its just alcoholism

Huge SO to my priest for coming over while I was standing awkwardly at a wedding reception and saying "What, can't socialize without a beer pong table in the room?"

SO to my mom. When I was singing in the car and couldn't remember some of the words she referred to me as a "tard". I'm so glad we're related!

SO to losing track of what day it is

SO to my dad for telling me if I have an erection lasting longer than 4 hours to go rub one out.

Week 14

well since the BH decided to randomly start posting shoutouts again, this could be the last week. I guess it depends on how many shoutouts we can pack into this week, and the quality. Everyone knows this was just to tide us over until the real ones got back.

some input would be appreciated :)

Best of Lucky Week 13

SO to looking up euphemisms for boobs. I never knew there were so many ways to express my appreciation for flesh melons...or lactoids...or blouse bunnies...or Prisoners of the Playtex Penitentiary.

SO to finally finishing all four seasons of House. Hugh Laurie = DILF...Diagnostician I'd Like to Fuck.

ASO to the love triangle's bigger brother, the love tetrahedron.

SO to taking the laptop to the bathroom while i poop so i can continue talking to my crush. im sure he wouldnt mind.

SO to ikea. Your swedish-ness is just so silly.

aso to my little sister learning to drive and playing the entire "whisper song" aka wait til you see my dick... while my mother was in the front seat. kids these days.

so to my mom who just drunk dialed me and told me that my dad was taking advantage of her

SO to my mom and dad for planning a trip to paris the week after my little brother leaves for school and they become empty nesters. At least pretend you're sad we're gone?

ASO to not learning to leave boys at the bar.

aso to the batteries in my vibrator for dying when i needed them the most.

SO to the mallards for signing Gary Coleman. ASO to seeing him get ejected. WHATCHU TALKIN BOUT BLUE?

SO to not being a freshman and knowing what the Allison shoutouts are all about.

shout out to me for getting head from another intern in my MP's office during my internship in the houses of parliament this summer. rather ironic was that i was taking classes at the london school of economics where monica lewinski got her degree.

Week 13

Only a few weeks left shoutmonkeys... make us laugh

Week 12 Best-of

ASO to my physical and breast exam being the most action I've gotten all summer.

ASO to not being able to SIT UP from my bedroom floor for 21 hrs straight after a long night in mad-town

Potential SO to my coworker saying she'd do me, but it'd be vaguely whoreish...does that mean I should go for it?

SO to the 3-year old I babysit for pointing at the pimple on my face and saying, "You have a boo-boo! We have neosporin and a band-aid if you want?"...I'd make it an ASO, but she's just too damn cute saying it.

SO to finding this on the "about me" section of my Harvard friend's facebook profile:
"Shout Out to introducing my friend at Harvard to Shout-outs. Can we just tack that onto the list of reasons why Madison > Ivy Leagues?" Even bigger SO to the fact that he recognizes the truth.

SO to the stoplight at Doty/Broom for flashing the shocker instead of the stop hand.

ASO to learning that by naming my dog Xena, in Arabic it means adultery...and I just thought I was paying homage to the warrior princess!

SO to managing to swing my rent this month thru a combination of donating plasma and whoring myself out to the psych department.

SO to being a nude photography model-- If these photos show up on the internet someday and my students find them I'm going to be PROUD.

SO to the SOC. i love you and your need for 69 shoutouts.

ASO to my summer being one epic fail after another. I suck.

SO to my Dad - when my brother said, "I can't believe you sold that car, I loved that car, I had sex in that car!" he replied with "with anyone else?" Oh masturbation...

ASO to acid trips at the KK. I swear there were people actually having sex on the dance floor. Damns girls get some self respect!

just a question... where are we with the shoutout shirts?

ASO to getting so drunk that I fell into a load of thorns and couldn't get out for half an hour. SO to the only person who saw being so drunk themselves that they forgot almost instantly. ASO to being so drunk that I then called up the guy I like and informed him of my drunken falling into thorns. I guess once the scratches heal I'll have to find someone else to go see Batman with

Week 12

make bucky proud

Week 11 Rockstars

SO to my 10 year old brother who saw my dry legs and said i have reptile function....wow there are too many erectile dysfunction commercials on tv

SO to the kid i babysit for, who told me that the reason i didn't have to parallel park during my driving test is that i'm so old that they only had horses in my day.

ASO to the 4 year old boy in my camp class who came up to me and said, "you have a baby in your belly!". Yes I might have gained a little weight while in college but you could have at least asked instead of telling me. god i need a drink.

SO to my brother for explaining the Favre situation as 'So imagine you've had a dog since you were born, and then the dog dies. You cry, and it's hard, but you grieve and get over it. Then, a few months later your dog comes back to life. This zombie dog doesn't want to live with you and your new puppy, instead he goes to live with your neighbors who you HATE. It's so awful.'

"SO to me for being the first poster! ASO to me for being excited about it..."
making fun of you would be like making fun of a midget with down syndrome... it would just feel wrong afterwards

ASO to an inter-state facebook booty call. Ouch.

SO to my friend for falling asleep on my shoulder - it was cuter than cute. ASO to her drooling on my brand new shirt.

SO to my alcoholic aunt. At our family reunion, my niece asked, "What happens to the baby after it comes down, cradle and all?" My aunt traumatized her by responding, "The cradle hits the baby in the head, giving it severe brain trauma, and it dies. Yep, that's life for you," and went back to drinking straight whisky. She keeps it real-er.

"SO to going to Essen Haus, drinking 4 "Das Boot"(s) with my friends, getting into a peanut fight with a bachelor party, and waking up this morning butt-ass naked aside from the one sock on my foot."
which foot?

SO to kegs and cupcakes.

Week 11

gooooo for it

Week 10 Superstars

SO to the lifeguards at the waterpark where I work. Watching you chase after scattered "fecal matter" in the pool with nets has been one of the more hilarious moments of my summer. I do not envy you...

ASO to our Scrabble game last night. My friend and I had the epic opportunity to play "vagina" twice on one board, only to have it f*ed up by my brother

ASO to not being able to take shots. SO to practicing with ice cold water in dixie cups...Let's face it, we go to Wisconsin, its equally, if not more important than studying

SO to having sex instead of running tonight because I get a better cardio workout

ASO to me, I am the most pitiful franchise in baseball, and am only followed by fat, useless cocksuckers from the north side of the windy city. I wish someone would put me out of my misery.
-Oooh! Oooh! I know this one, Alex! Who are... the Chicago Cubs!

anti shout-out to walk of shaming home at 6:45am to the equinox and running into the cleaning lady, with whom i'm on a first-name basis. she tried to cover up her surprised "oh" by telling me about today's forecast (because she's so super nice) but i couldn't even look her in the eye because of how guilty i felt for her to now know what a bad girl i am

SO to thinking in shoutouts when i see cool shit happening

SO to the guy sitting behind me on the bus talking to himself about killing people in 1988 and the police finding dead bodies in the trunk of his car after he'd shot them twice. i need a car

SO to checking my e-mail at a sketchy European internet cafe to find out whether I got football tickets. Double SO to frightening some backpacking Slovenians with my victory dance, and being completely unable to explain the glory that is Wisconsin football to them

ASO to Farve changing his mind more than a 4 year old at Baskin Robins

shout-out to being a girl and living in a frat next year. walks of shame will be so much shorter!

SO to coming back to madison for the weekend, hooking up with 2 ex's and smoking some of the dankest buds ive ever seen. God i love this town.

If CC, Fielder, McClung, and Gagne were in a lifeboat, how long would it take for that thing to sink? I'd give it 3.14 minutes.
-3.14 minutes.. because they eat so much pi?

SO to my roommate who left behind two fridges, a perfect table for mixing drinks, and a mostly empty room for my one and only kegger this summer! ASO to him randomly coming back with his family the morning after to finish emptying his room, only to discover two fridges full of booze, his table glossed over in liquor, and a futon mattress complete with condom wrappers next to it

Friends don't let friend shout out drunk

SO to the anti-drug commercial where the kid builds a cocoon of pot and emerges a bald loser. If I had enough pot to build a cocoon...

"Um, he's a sprinter on the track team and a business major. SO to that."
-You know what they say about sprinters, they always finish in under fifteen seconds...

shout-out tee shirts!

here's the shout out tee shirt so far. the slogan on the back was a great shout out from this week (author of said shout out, be proud). however, that's subject to change if someone can think of something amazing! post ideas for the shout out on the back that relates to either wisconsin, bucky, badgers, madison or the shout outs and general and we'll pick the best one! happy shouting

http://www.customink.com/designs/shoutouts/8693660-438896?cm_ven=hotlink&cm_cat=2&cm_pla=Body_txt&cm_ite=design

Week 10

last week's shout outs were weak guys... heavy on the complaining, light on the funny. lets step it up!

peace, love and shoutouts

Best of Week 9

SO to you, SOC, for the AMAZING Week 9 starter. I fucking love King's! Let's get together & play... but I call little man.

ASO to dog farts. Seriously not cool.

SO to playing kings and making the best rule ever. It is actually super hilarious to make someone play standing up if everyone is playing on the floor.

SO to week 9 bust a rhyme! I'll go first...orange. Suckers.

SO to my brother for warning me not to go upstairs for a couple hours. ASO to the ugly pictures he put in my mind of my parents in bed and the fact that I can hear the waterbed swishing. One of those things that makes you go 'uuuuuuuuuuugh'.
JUST LIKE YOUR MOM!
SCORE!

ASO to whoever the "controller" is here for not posting my SO. who are you too judge, bitch. $10 bucks you don't even post this.
i can't wait till summer's over and you get off your little power trip. i'm protesting by not posting another single SO the rest of the summer.
oops, looks like somebody owes the shoutout controller $10. well played, making a bet with the person who directly effects the outcome of said bet.

ASO to people who signed up in the lottery just so they could sell their tickets for a higher price. I hope Bucky eats your soul for pricing out my friends.

SO to hitting the refresh button repreatedly solely in order to see the hit counter increase by one each time. please tell me this hasn't been here the whole time, otherwise my summer has been a waste until now.

ASO to the huge disappointment of eating Ian's while sober. You were so delicious when I was trashed and sitting on the curb. Daylight, a table, and no alcohol apparently takes away your magic.

ASO to pEoPlE wHo TyPe lIkE tHiS. iSn'T tHiS aNnOyInG!? eVeRyOnE bUt yOu sEeMs to tHiNk sO. tHeRe sHoUlD bE a lAw, mAnDaTiNg tHaT yOuR fInGeRs aRe bRoKeN uNtIl yOu cAn uSe a kEyBoArD pRoPeRlY. n0oB.

ASO to bad haircuts and to people who say "don't worry, you're hair will grow back". It may grow back, but in the meantime, I look like a 4 year old took a pair of safety scissors to my head. Maybe I'll just shave it all off and get a wig.

Week 9

bust a rhyme

oh wait, we're not playing kings...

Best of Week 8

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week 8

keep it up

best of week 7

SO to going on my first run of the summer. ASO to being chased by my neighbors pet pig on that run this morning. Is that supposed to be some sort of sign?

ASO to a knee wound and massive amounts of blood whilst acting out "immigrants crossing the border". Beware of the dangers of charades

SO to the man on craigslist who claims "I love to date large white woman with a pear shaped butt." what is a pearshaped butt?. DOUBLE SO to him saying "i show affection in pubic." hahah oh lord

ASO to the apocalypse; Gas is $4 a gallon, half of the Midwest is underwater or tornado ravished, Colorado and California are on fire, and I can't have a goddamn tomato

SO to going to Dairy Queen and licking penis sculptures out of our soft serve cones. Double SO to a bus load of summer school kids pulling up while we're doing not so decent things with our ice cream penises

SO to sailing & pirates Saturday. Major SO to dressing up like a pirate, attacking other boats, and claiming booty while drinking & having a blast

ASO to accidentally swallowing one of my contact lenses. that was weird

SO to making drinking festive, with things such as case races and mexican nights, just to make our raging alcoholism seem celebratory

SO to Cookie Monster for admitting that he was the "Robert Downey Jr. of cookies" in the 70s and 80s

SO to long nights and awkward mornings! At this rate, I won't be able to ban my kids from doing anything, because I've already done it all. ASO or SO to living by the motto, "an awkward morning beats a boring night?"

ASO to having a super weird feeling hangover. I don't have to throw up and I don't have a headache, but I have NO balance, I have crazy chest pain, swollen eyes from something, blood coming out of my nose at random moments, and snot and vomit on my sheets.
Yeah, I'm a winner."
... I didn't know that Amy Winehouse posted shoutouts

SO to the little boy meticulously looking through his box of animal crackers for the seal because he read on the box, "Do not eat if seal is broken

SO to all the senior citizens living in Towers right now. You're way nicer neighbors than the coasties were, and I'll take your tour buses over their endless cabs any day

ASO to the American Apparel ads using sexually-ambiguous models. You confuse me. And when did Taylor Hanson start modeling clothes

SO to the delivery guy at Jimmy John's for accidently delivering his personal stash of crack with some subs to Meriter hospital

SO to my crackberry, without you I might actually have tried crack

SO to my mother who said she knew some sign language then proceeded to flick the middle finger saying, you know what that means, don't ya? (This is all during a church sermon of course)

Fat chicks hitting on dudes is like cornbread... "Ain't nothin' wrong with that

SO to the guy who posted an ad on Criag's List for free semen

Week 7

Go for it

Best of Week 6

SO to sitting outside a Starbucks with your best friend from back home and deciding that "we just really don't like the penis." Bigger SO to the old man sitting next to us who obviously was not listening to anything through his headphones as the expression on his face when this was said changed from bemused to entirely horrified

ASO to the female poster that keeps arguing with my fiancee. I am sorry that I got drunk and flirted with you, but I have to say that there is no other person in the world for me, besides my fiancee. She is my heart and soul. So to lay this to rest. I only want my fiancee and no body else. Period. I love her with all of my heart. Not even that girl that I work with that won't stop hitting on me has a chance. So if she is reading this too, stop, I want no other woman in my life other than the ONE that I have. She is the only girl that will ever make me happy.
*WHIPCRACK*

SO to graduating a year early, and thus spending the last year in elementary school with AmeriCorps instead. That's right - while the rest of you procrastinated, wrote 40-page papers, and went to class, I was busy reading Clifford and counting to 10. Three-year-plan? Best. Choice. Ever

ASO to the 1st graders I volunteer with for sharing their oral thrush outbreak and having every doctor at Dean Urgent Care tell me I'm the only 22-year old they've ever seen with thrush. Great

"HUGE ASO to Qwest DSL being down in the entire state of Iowa and all but one of the libraries in my area being in mandatory evacuation zones... the library that isn't a hotspot. My computer is totally useless now. Even bigger ASO to not getting internet back til sometime next week at the very earliest."
ASO to you!!! you're like the chick from Heroes who can access the internet with her mind!!! crazy! not having internet but being able to post to an ONLINE BLOG

ASO to the mosquito bite ON MY ASS! trying to nonchalantly scratch that all day at work sucked

ASO to the apocalypse; Gas is $4 a gallon, half of the Midwest is underwater or tornado ravished, Colorado and California are on fire, and I can't have a goddamn tomato

ASO to the old lady who told me she thought we were really experiencing the beginning of the apocalypse because a black man may be elected president. Double ASO to being outside the wonderful liberal bubble that is Madison

ASO to the guy in the apartment behind mine who was standing on his balcony railing during the thunderstorm frantically pumping his fists in the air and screaming "OH YEAH!" then waving to me and my roommate and screaming some more. I don't know what you were on, but it was creepy, dude.

ASO to not being able to read SO's about segway guy because the semester is over--they were too great and a good laugh. anyone have any/know what he's up to these days?
fall semester i'm just going to chill at social sciences with a boombox and follow him around blasting "final countdown" on max volume

SO to blaming my dog for breaking my sister's chia pet. Unfortunately i have no idea what Really happened, due to being black out drunk. I feel this is an acceptable way to manipulate the situation

SO (or aso?) to American Apparel coming to Madison. I expect hipster frenzy (and eventual disowning after it becomes too prevalent, although it's a little late for that), confusion from sconnies, and anger from whoever posted the aso about guys in v necks. If everyone wasn't wearing it already, they will be next year

SO to wanting to send my boyfriend a Happy Father's Day card. ASO to realizing that he probably would not find it funny

huge SO to my summer Stats 301 professor for telling us today that he recently got a marriage proposal via email from a Phillipino royal (a guy) that he met in Washington, D.C. in March because California had legalized Gay Marriage. So to him for then asking us how should he respond

shout out to playing beer pong with someones grandma and having her tell us she wished they had "this game" at the senior center

Week 6

go nuts